Political Time-Share

Let’s cut to the chase…  We all know our government is for sale so let me outline my suggested program for a “New Constituent Timeshare” on politicians.  Yesterday proved my point.  Obama spent $540 Billion, and Romney spent $376 Billion. 

Who won?

It was the big contributors, not the American public.  Honestly, I don’t care who won the election, we all lost.  We bought the lies, deceit, attacks, and other obfuscations that keep us from seeing the truth.  Our Government is for sale!

Here’s a simple solution to help us all get into the game.

PolMart – short for Political Market.  This is a new franchise to allow the 99% an opportunity to buy into our government.

We all recognize that wealthy private citizens and big corporations are allowed to spend billions of dollars to purchase influence in our government directly.  We also recognize that they do it through lobbyists and special interest groups that have billions of dollars to purchase this influence.  Then there are political action committees sponsored by these big businesses that also influence political outcomes.  Since none of us has the wealth to directly purchase political influence, PolMart allows us to pool our money to collectively influence the political market place.

Think about it.  This puts us back in the driver’s seat.  We can once again have political influence.  Our representatives will be forced to listen and act on our needs and wants.  They can no longer ignore our requests… We’ll be calling the tune and they will have to dance.  Money talks and very loudly; look at what happened yesterday.  They contestant that spent the most money won.  He was selling and we bought it.

What does this say about us as Americans?  It says that we value money above truth, justice, honor, and what’s best for us all.  It says that we no longer look for truth we accept what these ads tell us.  If advertisers can sell untested drugs on TV to increase sexual satisfaction or completely empty your bladder, they can sell you anything.  They did, too.  We bought another four years of Obama.  We will continue our slide toward socialism and spiraling debt.  Romney said that 47% of Americans are on government support.  You can easily see why we have another four years of Obamanation ahead of us.

As you enter PolMart it’s easy to find your favorite aisle: Left, Center, Right, and Independent in the back of the store.  PolMart reserves the right to color code these representatives for easy identification; Red, Blue, and Rainbow.  This makes is simple to identify your particular political leanings.  Each representative will wear a tag stating their character, committee influence, political influence, and price for an entire year of support.  Just note the name of your representative and walk to the checkout lines.  The clerks have sophisticated computers that can quickly calculate how much influence you can afford.  Maybe 30 seconds isn’t much time, but you’re living large walking proudly with Congress in your pocket!  If you’re smart you’ll have prepared your 30 second speeches about why saving the Boll Weevil is such an important cause or why married men should be allowed to compete in the Miss America Pageant.

Think of this as “Political Time Share.”  We are all familiar with the “Vacation Time Share” concept.  This is exactly the same except that you buy political influence for your particular cause.  PolMart will accept all forms of payment for these transactions including Food Stamps.  I know that means give up steak for a few days, but think of the potential gains for your meager investment of a few dollars.

Now we can have the political clout of the big boys without the massive investment and overhead.  There is no need to wine and dine these assholes: PolMart does that for you.  There is no reason to travel to DC or some other shithole place to meet these whores: PolMart does that, too.  PolMart is the intermediary and we do the dirty work for you.  PolMart will be publicly traded on all the stock exchanges with the profits rolled back to the company to ensure the lowest possible costs (That’s what we want you to believe.  Hell I need to make a living, too). (I’m just being honest.)

PolMart is a for profit company specializing in aggregating money to purchase political influence.  We maintain political neutrality to ensure that no one party has more influence than you the buying public can afford.  We treat our buyers equally and maintain absolute privacy.  Only the FBI, CIA, NSA, Homeland Security, YMCA, YWCA, BSA, GSA, USN, USAF, USMC, US Army, Coast Guard, National Guard, and other agencies with money will have access to our records and your transactions.  We will maintain an email list to notify you in advance of any changes in your representative’s political leanings, and of any specials deals available during election cycles.  We will keep you informed as the market values change on your representative.  We also plan Presidential Campaign Specials every 4 years so you can get in o the action, and we plan to contact our man in Las Vegas to set up “Off Poll” betting on political contests so you hedge your bets.  It’s a Win-Win-Win-Win-Win scenario!


Note:  This little farce is intended to wake up American to the realization that what happened yesterday and during every election is not about you or me.  It is about politicians keeping positions of power through the most amazingly powerful tool available to them… YOUR MONEY!  The money they spent was yours.  It came out of your pocket, either through direct contribution, taxes, or purchase made at big businesses.  These two contestants spend almost a Trillion Dollars on this contest.  They spent your money telling you how to vote… and you bought it.  Did you really think that any of them represented you?  Really?

My predictions for the next four years:

  • ·         A new war in some worthless country – Maybe 2 or 3

o   Democratization worked so well in the Middle East, why not keep going…

  • ·         Additional Social programs to support those who refuse to work
  • ·         Increasing welfare rolls… I expect about 65% of Americans to be on support by 2016
  • ·         The demise of Social Security
  • ·         National Healthcare administered by the Healthcare companies (Almost a reality already)
  • ·         Amnesty for Illegal Aliens
  • ·         Free Education for Illegal’s
  • ·         Free Healthcare for Illegal’s
  • ·         Free everything for selected groups – especially oil rich nations that dump their unwanted trash on our shores
  • ·         Higher Taxes for the Upper and Middle Classes
  • ·         Fewer Jobs – Higher Unemployment
  • ·        Another Great Depression!
  • ·         Increasing Debt – My guess is $45 Trillion by 2016
  • ·         Socialism in America – That will solve all of our problems.

o   Note: Socialism has never worked anywhere, but we are American and we will make it work…  Just watch!

I plan to track this for the next four years.  I’ll report my findings in 2016 if I still have the freedom to do so…